Short memoirs from the Simpson Brothers of their childhood with their parents, growing up through their early teens and the moment Walter first met Coral.

Phoenix, aged 20: "He was a nobody. I was Phoenix Simpson."

Landon, aged 16: "She had long legs, but her upper region was my favourite asset."

Walter, aged 15: "This was exactly why I loved fighting with our rivals. It was the perfect way to let off steam."

Eli, aged 16: "No one would understand me anyway. I didn’t even understand myself sometimes."

Gomez, aged 14: "The more money and possessions, the better. Call me a greedy bastard, but that's just the way I was."

Giovanni, aged 5: "I loved cookies and chocolate and ice-cream and doughnuts and chips and chicken nuggets and ketchup, especially ketchup."

Severn, aged 11: "Physical Education. It was the worst thing ever."

Main story: The Seven Deadly Simpson Brothers
Contains mild violence.